Moving Beyond The Voices In Your Head
By Mahadeva Ishaya
When I learned to meditate with the Ishayas it seemed that my head became busier. It appeared that, rather than quieting my mind, I noticed more and more thoughts. This wasn’t what I had expected when I learned. Was I doing it correctly?
Fortunately, I was reminded that in the Ascension practice it is OK if thoughts rise in our awareness. But so many? Still, I used the techniques as taught and began to become more familiar with an unchanging level of awareness, one that was untouched by the thoughts.
"..the thoughts seemed to become less compelling ... "
This space became so habitual and attractive to hang out in that the thoughts seemed to become less compelling to put my attention on – even those juicy ones that I would previously have chewed on in my mind (guilt, regret, self-judgement, expectation, wondering about the future, etc). Somehow, they almost magically took less of my attention, replaced with an experience coloured by contentment, peace and joy
A Case Of Mistaken Identity
We all have thoughts. Some happy, some sad, and sometimes we can see them for what we are – things that come and go, separate from “us”.
But there are thoughts that are nearer, that we have come to identify so closely with that we think they are us. We believe these “voices” are our voices. And there can be so, so many of them.
"I was shocked when I started meditating "
I was shocked when I started meditating at how many voices I had in my head, because for the first time I was able to see them as something separate from my actual awareness.
There was the Critic (always telling me I wasn’t good enough, or had made a mistake), the Cheerleader (We can do it!), an uncertain voice, voices that sounded a lot like my parents and other authority figures from my earlier life. It was very busy in my head.
What I began to realise was that the real suffering in my life was the result not of what was happening, but was determined by what the voices in my head thought of what was happening.
Events or situations were (to my surprise) somehow “neutral”, but it was my internal commentary that determined whether I was pleased, sad or angry (or another emotion) about it.
I was like a puppet on a string, moving to the whim of what my inner dialogue was about something. Happy thoughts? I was a happy puppet. Sad thoughts? I was a sad puppet. Anxious thoughts? I was an anxious puppet. And so on.
It felt like a revelation to realise this. It was humbling to see how these thoughts, these voices I had assumed to be me, had been running the show the entire time.
What could I do?
Experiencing Reality - Peace Beyond The Thoughts
Fortunately, through the Ishayas’ practice, I began to be conscious beyond the changing parade of thoughts and commentary. To have my awareness resting in unchanging and untouchable Peace. To be consciously aware, and to see the thoughts and voices as things I did not need to pay any attention to.
Freedom from the voices is when we begin to truly live the purpose of our creation. Free from the influence of the voices which would undermine our movement to fully discover and express the greatness of what we truly are.
"There is no fight to be had, no dragons to slay."
The voices aren’t real, they just exist on the oxygen of our attention. There is no fight to be had, no dragons to slay. Allow Peace to capture your Awareness. Allow Awareness to become aware of itself, through the simple and consistent practice of the Ishayas’ Ascension, and life lived simply, fully and beautifully flourishes.
This is why we are here. It is the simplest of things to experience. It just takes a little courage to begin walking away from those familiar voices, into the heart of a new experience. One that at first may feel strange, but becomes more and more familiar. The experience of Home.